December 27

I haven't been on the computer since I got home... There's been a lot of chaos with Christmas and adjusting to being home (but the best kind of chaos!) instead of going back and recounting the 22-26, I'm going to go a little out of order. I just got out of church...being back at church for the first time in over four months was something Dusty really pushed for. It's funny because it was always me pushing for us to attend church. There's just something about being in a place filled with others and worshipping the Lord. Singing and praising in a setting like that never seizes to give me goosebumps and bring tears to my eyes. It's one place that I 100% feel God's presence. But anyways, Dusty knew how much going to church meant to me...listening to sermons online or my Christian contemporary Pandora station just isn't the same. So, this morning, my family and I went to church. There's a lot that has to be done in the mornings for me to get out of the house, but for the first time EVER, mom said we needed to leave the house by 10:00, and all of us were in the car and pulling out of the driveway right at 10:00. 

Last week, Proverbs 3:5-6 appeared in my devotional and I was talking about how Christy Jaye had pointed that verse out to me years ago. It's one part of scripture that I can recite by heart. Today's sermon was on that very verse. Coincidence? I don't think so. 

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, 

Lean not on your own understanding,

But in all your ways acknowledge Him

And He will make your paths straight"

The sermon was about finding God at the intersection of life and faith. As we get older, it sometimes becomes increasingly difficult to trust people. God not only wants us to trust Him, but to trust Him with all our hearts...a phrase that means to trust with absolutely everything. Do we though? If God asks us to do something, will we?? It's not easy...it never has been to trust completely. And this whole experience has tested me far more than I could've ever imagined. I'm trying to trust God with my whole heart, because I know He's trying to use me for His glory right now and that this experience is not only teaching and growing me, but also those around me. The pastor even said that God may ask us to do things we may not want to do, but the people around us will be blessed...this definitely isn't something I want to do, but I not only pray that others are being blessed, I'm actually witnessing it. We may not know His will, but we are doing it as long as we are trusting and loving Him. 

A couple other things that stuck with me were when the pastor reminded us that Jesus gave everything for us so that we could share His love with others. He prayed for the upcoming year and said that God isn't done with us, but that we should understand that it may take sacrifice...I believe it's taking a lot of sacrifices, but I find comfort in the fact that it is His will. 

One of the songs the band played said "I'm coming back to the heart of worship and it's all about You...I'm sorry Lord for the things I've made it when it's all about you." That's got me thinking...so often we make things about us, especially when praying and talking to God. I think the reason I find going to church and singing those songs so powerful is because it is all about Him in those moments.

I'm so thankful for today and that although Dusty couldn't make it to church, he kept pressing for me to go. I think it was just what I needed. I'm looking forward to many more Sunday mornings at home before weeks filled with intense rehab in Philly...I hope every Sunday leaves me feeling as refreshed and reminded of all God has done for me and that He isn't done with me yet.