April 15

I HAVE MY NEW WHEELCHAIR!! We headed to Philly as soon as therapy was over yesterday. It's a strange feeling being back... Neither Dusty nor I are big on cities, so we always talked about how much we hated Philly. I think being in the hospital and separated for so long didn't help much, but the combination of the relationships I made, how much stronger I got while at Magee, and my drive and desire to get back to school may have changed my perception.

I actually got excited and felt this sense of being home when that skyline came into view. The welcome I got when I checked in at the Sheraton only intensified that feeling. I got free breakfast buffet, along with my mushroom and egg white omelet that they remembered I liked. And on my way out, the girl at the coffee counter had a large coffee with steamed milk ready for me. Who would've guessed I kind of missed living at a hotel? 

The welcome I got at Magee was just as great...I saw doctors, therapists, the kitchen staff, nurses, custodians and of course, Herb. I in no way wish I were back in that hospital, but being close enough to visit more often wouldn't be so bad. Mom and I were saying that all it'll take is a trip back when I'm having a bad day to put things back into perspective. I got to meet a few new patients (even a guy about my age who is now in the same room I was in...we bonded over how uncomfortable that bed is! Haha). I look forward to being able to go back and meet new patients, hear their stories and hopefully encourage them with my story.

My new chair is so much lighter! It's smaller and much easier to push...and do wheelies! I even took it outside and practiced going up the ramp outside Magee...pushing up the incline wasn't even that bad. Dennis is going to make me work on my wheelchair skills this upcoming week- wheelies, curbs, ramps, etc. I know it'll be challenging, but hopefully it'll also be fun and not scary...I was scared to death the first time I did a wheelie! Matter of fact, I would have a mini heart attack anytime Dusty would come up behind me and tip me backwards. And he'd do it just to get a reaction out of me! 

While Mom checked out of the hotel, I did some more visiting and then found myself in front of my favorite sunny window. I looked out at the people hurrying down the sidewalks and the cars  filling the streets, everyone lost in their own world. And I was thinking about all those days I sat in that same place, longing to be outside amongst all those people. Sitting there, watching everyone below, made me temporarily forget about all I was going through. I'd get lost in watching the chaos of the city and forget that I wasn't able to join. I sat there thinking about the first time I was able to break free of the walls of a hospital.. Months of being in the ICU or at Magee, being able to watch everything from the window, but not able to join...I felt trapped. I was happy to be able to enjoy that view and the warmth of the sun while still being comforted by the fact that I'd be able to leave as soon as Mom was ready.