January 20

I may or may not have a coffee addiction... Our hotel serves Starbucks in the lobby and whoever I'm with gets some for the two of us each morning. We get our coffee then go across the street to catch the shuttle. Yesterday, the lady at the register told my dad that coffee was on her the next day..just because. Then, yesterday afternoon, my shuttle driver, Herb, gave me two gift cards to Starbucks- a $5 and a $10 card. We had talked last week about what coffee we like and he'd said Starbucks was too strong for him, so I'm guessing someone had given him these cards and he remembered that I like it. They're small gestures, but I thought it was so nice from both people. 

I'm still working hard in therapy..it's exhausting but so worth it already. Today alone I did the treadmill, stim bike, balancing activities, and was in the standing frame. I'm not big on naps or getting into bed sooner than I need to, especially after all that time I was in the ICU and forced to stay in bed, but all this hard work is helping me sleep better at night! 

Jeremiah 29:11 has always been one of my favorite verses. God has a plan for me...not just a future, but a prosperous future. That's something I needed to be reminded of. I'm so caught up in thoughts about my current condition that it's hard to think that much into the future. I try to think about how great it'll be to look back and be able to say "I once was quadriplegic" or "I had a trach." It'll also be good to look back on these months and see how much they've taught me and how I'm going to take what I've learned and use it, especially in my career as an optometrist. It's just difficult to picture all of that right now. Doctors, therapists, friends, and family all make comments or say that I'm going to walk again and I pray with everything I've got that it's true...I'm just so scared to get my hopes up and picture my future like that. I've always been one to plan everything and always knew what my next step was going to be...I mean, I've known I've wanted to be an eye doctor since the third grade! So, it's a change for me to not be planning everything right now. 

"Simply trust me and thank me in advance for the good that'll come out of it all." I'm still trying to be trusting during these hard times...God has a plan for me and this is in His hands.