The day I've been looking forward to for SO long is FINALLY here! I actually downloaded a countdown app and it started at 140 days. Looking at it now and seeing 15 hours left is unreal to me. I'm sitting in my apartment alone tonight (finishing the rest of the wine in my fridge) and reflecting on the past year.
I moved back to Philadelphia to finish my last semester of classes and my last year of clinic (this includes finishing my third year clinic sessions and my first rotation as a fourth year- my last and final year of school). My classmates and friends have all graduated and I came back to this busy city not only by myself, but now with a wheelchair. Needless to say, so much has changed. I've had a lot of adjusting to do and there have been a lot of rough times over the past 12 months. There were days that I didn't think I wanted to get out of bed the next day because I literally didn't think I had enough energy.
Now that I've made it past all of those obstacles, it feels like no big deal. It wasn't until in this moment that I'm realizing how strong I've been (and I'm feeling pretty proud of myself). I not only finished my required school time in Philly, but I've done it on my own (I say that a little loosely because my family and Dusty have made sure to visit every couple of weeks and I've formed great relationships with my apartment front desk staff and maintenance men). But still, I did it.
I'm thinking about how many snowstorms and rain showers I've wheeled through. The car break in that I overcame. The several fire alarms in my apartment building. Not to mention all the challenges I've faced in clinic and with patients. As difficult as it's been, I think I needed this year to build my confidence again. Instead of just listening to people tell me how inspiring and strong I am, I can look back on this year and agree with them. (I AM STRONG. Look what I did!)
I still have three more 3 month rotations and two more parts of boards before graduating in May, but I get to do all of that from home. With Dusty. With my family. With my support system. This is the excitement I was feeling as my time in Philly was coming to an end right before I got sick in August 2015. I felt like I had been waiting for January 2016 for so long and then it was all taken away from me in a matter of days. I think for that reason, it almost felt like tomorrow's move out day was never really going to happen. I had that countdown and everything, but it still didn't feel real. Well, it's feeling real now!
I'm sure I could sit here and type for hours, but I just wanted to update everyone that the day is finally here! I have my very last clinic session at The Eye Institute at school tomorrow morning and I should be home by dinner (with the help of my parents and Dusty, who will be packing up the UHaul while I'm at clinic tomorrow). It's going to be hard to say goodbye to my friends at clinic and the professors and staff I've gotten so close to, but I think everyone can agree that there is nothing like being home.
