I seem to be back to doing what I do best--committing to way more than I can handle! I must think that there are way more than 24 hours in a day (and also forgetting that I enjoy getting my 8 hours of sleep every night, making the hours I'm up and functioning even less). Let me back track a little. I went up to Philadelphia to my school a couple weeks ago. They were offering a four day CE (continuing education) class for about 50 doctors and professors. Since the class was one of the 0.5 credit courses I needed for my transcript, I was invited to come and participate. It was a little intimidating to think about...taking a class with the professors that have taught me everything I know and are already established doctors, but I was also excited to come back to campus for more than just a day trip.
I booked my favorite, very accessible, room at the Sheraton for three nights and my friend, Carly, stayed with me the first two. She was taking the same class as me and we needed to do some catching up since we hadn't seen each other in months. Mom dropped me off at the school on Thursday and Carly drove me to and from the hotel for the next couple days. (I'm still dealing with the vocational department to pay for my hand controls, so even though I have my license, I have to keep waiting).
It's such an amazing feeling to finally be completely independent again. It's crazy the things that we take advantage of on a daily basis. But when I'm in a place, like the Sheraton, that is fully accessible, I feel like myself again. I don't have any limitations (except for when I dropped the shampoo bottle under the sink and couldn't reach it). And then being back at school just reinforced that feeling. I sat there in lectures thinking "yeah, I'm in a wheelchair, but I'm doing this. And I'm going to be a doctor." I felt more determined and empowered than I have since I got sick.
Before I left to go home, I got to visit the new clinical skills lab. One of the professors asked if I wanted to come see it because it's now accessible. I asked "for the patient or the doctor?" because I had a feeling it was only for the patient, but I was told it's accessible for BOTH! The lab isn't even open for students yet because it is so new, but I got the grand tour and I loved it!! I was able to get around all the equipment and slide in under the tables without any problems. I had a couple suggestions that would make my job, as the doctor, a little easier in regards to reaching the microscope while the patient was in the exam chair, but all of the professors were really receptive to my advice. They spent a long time helping me problem solve and we talked about what changes we could make for when I come back and start doing exams.
Speaking of coming back to do exams...I got to talk with a couple of the deans and professors in charge of my education plan. In order to keep my financial aid in check and my loans in deferment, I have to complete the two classes I'm taking by July 5. Everyone was worried that was asking too much of me, but I had to tell them that I'm willing to work hard and get these last few classes over. As long as I have a deadline, I can make it work. It's when everyone tells me "do this when you're ready," that I start to think I have all this time on my hands. But anyways, we came up with a deadline. July 5. So, I got home and took the midterm for one of my classes and got an 85 (!!) and have been studying for the two finals ever since. The tentative goal is for me to finish these courses and move back to Philadelphia by the end of August to start making up some of my clinic time. I have clinic hours I need to make up and then I will be able to do my third year rotation there as well instead of having to move and then come back. We also talked about possible sites for my other rotations that were closer to home. I don't like to get too excited about these things until they actually happen because this whole process with school has been trial and error. Just because we make a plan to do something, doesn't mean it actually happens or that it happens in a timely fashion. But for now, I'm getting through these 40 hours of lectures and taking the finals for the hardest courses in optometry school. Fingers crossed that the clinical aspect will work out the way we want them to. I guess only time will tell over the next couple months!
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