In PT, I did the stim bike. They attach pads with electrodes to the muscles responsible for whatever movement you want to make. The therapists said it was a good sign that my legs responded so well to the stimulation, Afterwards, I practiced sitting and maintaining balance. I was surprised to find that I could hold my balance much longer than yesterday. I could even raise my arms off the mat!
I cooked my first meal in OT- gluten free pumpkin pancakes! I had to do everything on my own. I even cracked the eggs open with one hand! (I needed the other arm to balance while I leaned over the table). But I'd seen it on the cooking network and never tried it.
My trach is still doing well and I didn't even need suction (cleaning) today! I've been wearing the speaking valve full time, which is the next step in getting the trach taken out. Everyone has been commenting about how nice it is to finally hear a clear voice after I'd only been able to mouth or whisper words for the past 2 months. The next step in getting the trach out is to put a cap on it for 72 hours and not need suction, so I'm hoping that will happen soon.
My speech therapist upgraded my diet plan- no crunchy food yet, but I can finally have chipotle!! My nurses are also trying to get my liquid medicines switched to pills so I can start the process of getting the feeding tube removed.
Today, my devotional read: "Remember, all good things--your possessions, your family and friends, your health and abilities, your time- are all from me. Instead of feeling entitled to all these blessings, respond to them with gratitude. Be prepared to let go of anything I take from you, but never let go of my hand!"
I need to remind myself to "let go and let God," but it's difficult when it's something as big as wanting to walk again. The]nerve connections need to be made in order to achieve full movement, so I need to take it one day at a time. But my personality is pretty much opposite- I'm a planner. I like to make a list and check things off. I don't like to sit around and take things slowly. I'm constantly having to ask God to help me keep my patience and positive attitude that the staff have admired. The doctors and therapists are impressed with my progress and expect a full recovery, but I don't want to get my hopes up.
Last night, I didn't get to my devotional until bedtime. I use "Jesus Calling" and have it in book and app form. I was laying in bed, reading it on the iPad as one of the CNAs, a 60 year old man named Alfonso that has worked here since 1984, got me ready for bed. He asked what I was doing and when I said "reading my devotional," he peered over my shoulder. "Is it a religious thing?' he asked. I explained it to him and when he still seemed interested, I read it to him. I don't know his religious beliefs, but this was a special moment. Moments like this remind me that God is using me to impact other people. That doesn't mean that I don't still get frustrated and sad. It's a daily struggle, but I have the best support system anyone could ask for.
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